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Sunday, May 1, 2011

Mark V. Shaney

Returning to the theme of nonsensical humour, I present Mark V. Shaney. Mark V. Shaney was a fictional Usenet user whose postings were generated by a computer program, using Markov chain techniques, inspiring the name Mark V. Shaney. An online version of the program is available here:
According to the above site, the program works by finding all three word groups in the given body of text. It creates sentences by taking the last two words from the sentence in creation and adding a word to the end. The word added to the end is chosen so that it, along with the two words before it, completes one of the three word groups found in the text. This will often result in sentences that make sense in some areas, but are nonsense overall. In some cases it results in sentences that make perfect sense, but indicate somthing quite hilarious. First, an example of the former:

>From mvs Fri Nov 16 17:11 EST 1984 remote from alice It looks like Reagan is going to say? Ummm... Oh yes, I was looking for. I'm so glad I remembered it. Yeah, what I have wondered if I had committed a crime. Don't eat with your assessment of Reagon and Mondale. Up your nose with a guy from a firm that specifically researches the teen-age market. As a friend of mine would say, "It really doesn't matter"... It looks like Reagan is holding back the arms of the American eating public have changed dramatically, and it got pretty boring after about 300 games.
People, having a much larger number of varieties, and are very different from what one can find in Chinatowns across the country (things like pork buns, steamed dumplings, etc.) They can be cheap, being sold for around 30 to 75 cents apiece (depending on size), are generally not greasy, can be adequately explained by stupidity. Singles have felt insecure since we came down from the Conservative world at large. But Chuqui is the way it happened and the prices are VERY reasonable.
Can anyone think of myself as a third sex. Yes, I am expected to have. People often get used to me knowing these things and then a cover is placed over all of them. Along the side of the $$ are spent by (or at least for ) the girls. You can't settle the issue. It seems I've forgotten what it is, but I don't. I know about violence against women, and I really doubt they will ever join together into a large number of jokes. It showed Adam, just after being created. He has a modem and an autodial routine. He calls my number 1440 times a day. So I will conclude by saying that I can well understand that she might soon have the time, it makes sense, again, to get the gist of my argument, I was in that (though it's a Republican administration).

And an example of the latter:

"I spent an interesting evening recently with a grain of salt." 

I've spent a great deal of time messing about with the online version linked above. My usual technique is to take the text of two Wikipedia articles, about drastically different things, and run them both through. Here's some gems:

This one came from Wikipedia's article on cluster bombs, and the above linked site's explanitory text:

There are reports that it took 500 people 15 hours to get one transformer yard back on line after being hit with the current sentence being built and finding a valid word to add on to the end . 

So I guess you can demolish switchgear just by swearing at it.

These came from the articles on Barney, and torture:

Pickles are his favorite food and because of that, he actually has had them in different ways like pickles (also with pepperoni, peppers, pineapple and peanut butter) on a person in the United Nations Convention Against Torture

in Barney - Let's Go to the point of murder as well as "the exploitation of prisoners' phobias

Torture has been criticized for its lack of educational value

This one may be from the above combination, or may have come from the Barney and Uniform Code of Military Justices articles:

The Electronic Frontier Foundation hosted online archives from the UCMJ when attached or detailed to a cordial dislike of the United States are exempt from the show is saccharine, boring, annoying, dangerous or uneducational has made the program a target for parody and negative attacks by singing and attempting to hug unwilling pedestrians. 

This one came from the articles on Barney and the 2008 South Ossetia War:

The mixture of bright colors, unusual designs, repetitive non-verbal dialogue, ritualistic format, and the Provisional Administrative Entity of South Ossetia region as a formidable fighting force, but revealed important deficiencies".

This one came partially from the Armenian Genocide article, can't remember what the other input was:

In his report on the order of the Armenian Genocide as a continuation of the Armenian Revolutionary Federation's codename for their first real educational experience and it allows for the most basic traditional coping mechanisms.

 This is from the CONELRAD article, and a screed posted on the talk page of the Nonsense article:

The stations that stayed on the air and another station would take the hat off and hit people with it.

This one had somthing to do with the Bessemer Converter and Blue's Clues:

The converter is an opening, usually tilted to the same episode were tested, children showed increased material comprehension, especially in their annual list of America's most eligible bachelors.

According to these, The characters of the Harry Potter series were deeply involved in the Cyprus Conflict. And the Rwandan Genocide. Sometimes both at once:

The vessel then unloaded some 450 troops of the book, saying that after leaving Hogwarts, she joined the Holyhead Harpies and, after an initial failure, captured the Hill Elissaios. 

She returns to Hogwarts in search of Rowena Ravenclaw's diadem, Luna helps him enter Ravenclaw's common room in order to view a replica of the mass killings of Tutsis and Hutu political moderates by Hutus under the Hutu regime, with support from Uganda, vastly increased the ethnic tensions in the north by the Tutsi intended to enslave Hutus and thus must be resisted at all costs. 

Her mother died when she was only nine; due to a cease-fire in 1993 and the preliminary implementation of the diadem.

In Deathly Hallows, Luna and Mr Ollivander, but they are discovered, and later fights in the country and led to a experimental accident.

What the hell is an experimental accident?

More of the above, with involvement in the Afrika Korps, Ernst Kaltenbrunner, and Albert Speer as well:

He holds the wand together with Spellotape after nearly breaking it in half at the Potsdam War Academy.

Speer does not know what the American commander at Spandau Prison in the morning for a major interview published in Der Spiegel in November 1941 that conditions did not now "walk through life in a Harry Potter-themed party dressed as Hermione.

Kaltenbrunner gave himself up claiming to be inspected for traces of dark magic.

Reception In The Ivory Tower and Harry are captured by a Dutch citizen on vacation. 

He foresaw that the rear corps could be moved along one road in the Department of Mysteries, at the decisive point.

Accordingly he inferred that the march of the enslavement of house-elves, as even the house elves themselves do not wish to annex the Kingdom of Saxony and other territory beyond what was actually that of her name on to the method for the Promotion of Elfish Welfare'"

In popular culture Lindsay Lohan (centre) appeared as Hermione is a "very logical, upright and good" character.[2] Her parents are a bit bemused by their odd daughter, but quite proud of her encyclopaedic knowledge, she can always be used as a plot dump to explain the Harry Bladder sketches in All That, in which she begins her post-Hogwarts career by working in the Department of Mysteries, at the age of eleven to the instructions of the Euphrates and visited and mapped many parts of the German General Staff

One of his mistakes, Dumbledore felt that he already knows more about killing than we know about living.

He resists becoming involved with her because of the Use in War of Asphyxiating, Poisonous or Other Gases, and of Bacteriological Methods of Warfare.

The conflict continues to affect Turkey's relations with Cyprus, Greece and Turkey, two NATO allies, to the terms of the Order, aided by Dumbledore's Army, the Hogwarts Grounds Keeper and an original Member of the Prewetts, the Boneses, and the resulting population migrations along both sides of the Prewetts, the Boneses, and the permanent incapacitation of the book, most of the de facto Turkish Republic of Northern Cyprus that only he could reveal the location vulnerable and it was abandoned in favour of The Burrow.[HP7] The Order led the fight against Voldemort during the intercommunal violence between 1963 and 1974; the most serious of which was followed by the establishment of the series. 

In the series finale, attention turned to escorting the Death Eaters' main target, Harry Potter, from the constitutional breakdown of 1963.[2] Turkey claims that she invoked her role as a guarantor under the 1960 Treaty of Guarantee in justification for it.[12] The intercommunal violence between 1963 and 1974, chose to leave their homes in the series.

I don't remember how this one came about, but it's awsome:

He was a highly decorated US soldier of the war,[2] receiving the Medal of Honor for his early service in the films Freaky Friday, Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen, Mean Girls and Herbie: Fully Loaded.

Enough with the commentary, I'll just throw 'em at ya:

Spears was an illegal and underground organization until the Anschluss of Austria by Nazi Germany in 1938. 

Spears was born in Vienna, then the capital of the top 50 film villains of all time.

Early life, career debut, and Innosense Britney Spears was an SS-Major in the 1980s.

Britney Spears's star on the Billboard 200 , and established her as a Southern Baptist.[8] Her parents expressed disappointment and concern at the decision to release her.[144] She has regained some visitation rights after coming to an "all for all" exchange of prisoners to be killed in Chechnya. 

In response, police were called to Spears's divorce petition, seeking physical and legal custody of her actions to the MVD, committed numerous and in June 1992 amidst the Ingush armed conflict against another Russian soldier, five Ingush villagers and even threatened to sue the Russian side; it was announced that Federline asked to cancel the court appearance. 

Spears announced she would "remain a virgin until marriage".[27] This pledge has been questioned due to her manager, who said she was released to radio stations on September 6, 1991, militants of the northern column was halted by deputy commander of the 21st century," she "spearheaded the rise of post-millennial teen pop in the 2004 documentary Fahrenheit 9/11, which samples a 2003 CNN interview about the ceasefires and peace negotiations, military forces continued to share joint custody of her father James Spears and her father James Spears and Federline continued to share joint custody of their coverage for the Kremlin, Dudayev loyalists succeeded in capturing some 20 Russian Army troops were killed, 17,892 were wounded, and 1,906 are missing in action.[38] According to Russian newspaper Gazeta, approximately 35,000 ethnic Russian civilians and an ethnic Bashkir soldier were murdered by apparently drunk Russian soldiers; earlier, drunken Russian soldiers and Chechen rebels alike who committed illegal acts in connection with the federal forces

In January 2009, Spears achieved further success in solidifying her comeback single, "Womanizer".[162] This makes her fifth number one in the summer of 1999 - and soon Russia invaded Chechnya again, marking beginning of the Soviet-Afghan War), also resigned in protest of the city ablaze and falling shells scattering refugee columns.[36] The bombardment was however soon halted by the mostly-Turkish gunmen seeking to publicize the Chechen population and raising hostility to the Russian public and leadership. 

Aguilera described the double CD as "a throwback to the Inquisition, and how it influenced Spanish history. 

and its lead actress, Julie Andrews as an ecclesiastical tribunal started in 1478 by Catholic Church and magistracy, they still had to accuse all one's accomplices.

These four counties measured maximum levels higher than 6,000 microCuries per square meter.[6] Of all the nuclear tests exposed the greatest percentage of the Christian girl group ZOEgirl.

Her more pop rock-oriented second studio album, Missundaztood, which began a marked shift in the Congressional Record.

The album's third single, "You Make Me Sick," was a thermonuclear device with a diameter of about 390 m (1,300 ft). 

The placename Fuccerham looks like either "the home (hām) of the PG-13 rating, yet it includes a hard "k" sound in its third syllable, making it a natural fit for popular music that is written in lowercase).

Brezhnev was said to be a battle Caractacus and Truly were married!" "And lived happily ever after!" When Truly asks, "Is that how the story ends?" Caractacus changes the subject, then tries to use it to raise money.

There followed charges before the Volksgerichtshof, where, on 10 August 1944, he was active on the surface, providing lubrication and protection from moisture.

There are breweries in Middle Eastern countries such as Fraoch' by the malt.[69] The most common method of remembering the recipe for beer in this manner typically disturbs all the sediment, so it must be left for a year before primary school.

One quarter of all girls marry before the age of 2.

Romania In Romania, grădiniţă, which means "little garden" is the English name for cool fermenting beers of Central European origin.

Such specialized kindergartens can be 68% lower than bottled beer due to packaging differences.[134][135] Home brewing can reduce the environmental impact of beer Main article: History of beer Main article: Ale Cask ale Draught beer keg fonts at the Delirium Café in Brussels Draught beer from light (thereby preventing "skunked" beer) and barley wine.[108] Drinking chilled beer is malted grain.

These nurses are supported and supervised by the Scottish Heather Ales company[42] and Cervoise Lancelot by the behaviour of yeast used and the Sr. 

Depending upon the seniority of their principal, a Private Secretary may him or herself be regarded as an important role in controlling public drinking for the higher class because of their principal, a Private Secretary.

Bullshit (also bullcrap, bullplop, bullbutter, horseshit) is a person who is considered a prude because one refuses to consume ecstasy and participate in group sex with a group of strangers.

At the time, inmates were given one shower per week and one roll of toilet paper per month.[1] On September 9, 1971, responding to the collapse of first the Ulvaeus-Fältskog marriage (in 1979) and then of the prison.

The riot was based in part upon prisoners' demands for complete amnesty from criminal prosecution for the stage while Lyngstad and Fältskog pursued individual solo careers with varying success.

At 562 feet long, the battleship Nevada, which was judged to be drenched by falling water in the Marshall Islands, arrived by seaplane from Kwajalein.

Some of the Nuremberg Trials based on obesity, incest, age, race, poverty, poor hygiene, unattractiveness, or stupidity may also be used.

Some of the provisions, such as "yo mama", "yo momma", "yer ma", "ya mum", "your mum" or "your mom" are sometimes used, depending on the definition in the Hague conventions, are considered to be part of customary international law, and are binding on individuals if the belligerent power to which they belong is a party to the treaty which introduced the constraint.

He was repeatedly seen inside a barrel, floating in a drivers license factory "), the protagonist of the legislature to make law.[citation needed] Most such systems, however, recognize the concept of jurisprudence constante, which argues that even though judges are independent, they should judge in a barrel appeared in five early strips.

A man who looks like a normal stick-figure xkcd character, but for the addition of a small number of selected binding case laws.
He was repeatedly seen inside a barrel, floating in a barrel appeared in other comics along with her children, Robert'); DROP TABLE Students;-- aka "Little Bobby Tables" (a reference to SQL injection), and Elaine Roberts (although her first name is really "Help I'm trapped in a large body of water.

The above speaks for itself.

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